Son: What is the difference between star and planet?
Father: Stars twinkle and planets don't. If you want to look for stars you have look up or get knocked out. You can see all the planets in my Horrorscope.
Son: Why do stars twinkle?
Father: People on stars to save money on electricity turn the light on and off. According to law of Physics once we have seen an object we can blink and still the object would be there. So instead of blinking they turn the light off and then on again.
Son: So is earth a star or planet
Father: Good question , Earth is a satellite.
Son: What is a satellite?
Father: A satellite always shadows the planet. Like you see a few ugly women hanging around with the
good ones , to look good. They wear the same dress and eat the same food hoping that a potential suitor would be confused at least under the influence of alcohol. Those women are satellites.
Son: Wow!! So what is Moon?
Father: Moon doesn't exist. It is a conspiracy, the Moon is an alien spaceship. That is why it disappears sometimes. You start reading the magazines in Walmart , you will know it.
Son: I will tell my friends.
Father: Yes , spread the word. People think that Apollo landing was fake but I say the Moon itself is fake. Imagine keeping an alien base so near makes abduction easy.
Son: Yes, why do aliens abduct.
Father: Why does the school bully pick on you?
Son: For his fun.
Father: Why does your mother shout at me?
Son: It's her stress buster , she says.
Father: Same with aliens. They need fun and relief from stress too. So they abduct and torture the weak and defenseless.
Son: So Sun is a planet.
Father: Correct. How did you guess it?
Son: Because it doesn't twinkle.
Father: You are really smart , you have my genes in you.
Son: Have you seen an alien.
Father: Yes your mother is one.
Son: How do you know?
Father: Son you should see her without her makeup
Son: Then why did you marry her?
Father: She abducted me. You are a result of the experiment which she did on me.
Son: Wow!! What is a galaxy?
Father: It is a drinking place where me and my friends used to visit before I got abducted , I
mean I got married.
Son: So the Milky Way Galaxy!!
Father: Yes a lot of women used to come there. Some where really hot.
Son: So how did you get married to Mom.
Father: Son , I told you about satellites.
Father: I aimed for the star and was about to reach a planet but a satellite pulled me towards it.