(2m)   by ballekumar

Comedy Skits   (78040 Views 9 Comments)

Why do you beg?

Beggar: It is my business. What do you do?

Man: I work for Wall Street.

Beggar: Why do you rob?

Man: What? Any way. What kind of business is begging?

Beggar: Honest and with 100% profit. I don't invest anything and everything I make is profit.

Man: Yes you live off people's money.

Beggar: And you, you live of people's money and dreams? When people give me a dollar they know they have a dollar less. When people give you a dollar they have hope that you would give them at least a cent after making your profit. But you take it all!

Man: And you don't pay tax?

Beggar: Look the government is the biggest beggar and we have a honor system in place  between beggars. We don't beg from each other. You see the government builds roads out of tax money and we beggars need pavements. So they don't tax us. You Wall Street people have no honor. You are like those vultures who have become cannibals , one vulture fends on another dead one. Cheats!!

Man: Well what does your wife do?

Beggar: Begs.

Man: Even she begs. Haha!!

Beggar: She was a lawyer when she married me. Then she was convinced that this is a much nobler profession to earn money. What does your wife do?

Man: She is a politician!!

Beggar: You could have married a stripper!! A stripper just removes her own clothes but a politician strips a nation of everything.

Man: Heh!! Relax, you have some pretty strong opinions.

Beggar: I have opinions because I have ideals. I talk about my opinions. You are into stock market, you even sell your opinions to the highest bidder and tell their opinions to the general public. You don't have ideals , you have deals.

Man: Okk. Are you able to educate your children?

Beggar: Yes. One is a doctor and another teaches in a school.

Man: Cool, you must be making a lot of money.

Beggar: Yes and I don't put the money in Wall Street. I used the money to educate my children. I can buy an apple for a dollar and you sell the same in Wall Street for 500 dollars. Swindlers!! You know the bank told my friend his house is forclosed and we thought that the bank is going to close the house and give us back when we get them the money. Now my friend had forgotten something and so we went in through the window and saw another family dining. Those people sold his house to aht family!!

Man: Well I can't comment on all this.

Beggar:  Do you have any children?

Man: Yes, one son.

Beggar: Are you sure?

Man: What kind of question it is?

Beggar: Well if I see a couple where one is a Wall Street Broker and the other is a politician then it is first question that would come to the mind of most?

Man: Yes he is my son and he is in the Ivy League.

Beggar: Good, at least one thing I found that you didn't steal. Tell him to help people in order to wash off your sins. 

Man: Why are you so rude to me?

Beggar: At least I am not trying to kill you. You should be grateful.

Man: Ok. I don't think I should waste any more time on you.

Beggar: Wait don't go till I count all the money I made today. I don't trust you ..

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Submitted by KIPKOSKEI SHADRACK (not verified) on Thu, 03/29/2012 - 00:28
This is an absolute representation of how a capitalist society works.The satirizes the bourgeoises by using the beggar as his mouthpiece,he also exposes how corrupt the officials are by employing wit,iriny and abit of exaggeration.
Submitted by ballekumar on Thu, 04/12/2012 - 00:32
Submitted by Emilyan Ivanov (not verified) on Thu, 11/08/2012 - 21:35
I so agree with the beggar, but only with this, which are like him. Cause most of the beggars, are taking money for cigarettes or alcohol. And their children are begging people. then they give the money they made to their "parents" for cigarettes. And they? they starve ... i bet is not only in Bulgaria.
Submitted by ballekumar on Sun, 11/11/2012 - 08:56
Thanks Emilyan. Its' same verywhere.
Submitted by smiline (not verified) on Wed, 02/06/2013 - 01:28
nice one..................;)
Submitted by @uqiHY (not verified) on Fri, 07/19/2013 - 05:09
I DUNNO WHY BUT I LOVE DEBATES SO MUCH!!! keep inserting debates on your script, I don't care, about anything,
Submitted by Jayesh (not verified) on Wed, 01/22/2014 - 01:35
Hey buddy please can I use this?
Submitted by ballekumar on Wed, 01/22/2014 - 01:53
@Jayesh Please feel free to use any of my scripts.
Submitted by yasquerty (not verified) on Wed, 08/17/2016 - 02:32
This makes me laugh out loud hahaha the script is awesome...may i please use this???

2m Comedy Skits - Beggar