21 year old Jackson walks into Dr.Edwin (shirnk)'s office, lays across the leather couch in front of the large window outlooking the city (New York, New York) and waits patiently Dr.Edwin. the receptionest said the Doctor would be with him soon.
Moments later Dr.Edwin walks calmly through the door and sits in the black leather computer chair behind the black and silver aluminum desk, that had a white marble name plate with "Dr.Edwin Brown" engraved in gold.
Dr.Edwin: " so. Jackson. tell me. why are you here today?"
Jackson: " well doc, ya see? i have been having some awfully strange dreams lately and they have given me quite a scare. theese nightmares have had a bigger impact on my life than any dream should. "
Dr.Edwin: "what KIND of nightmares have you been having that have had such an impact on your life?"
Jackson: " it's the strangest thing really, the dream always starts out as me and a couple of my old budds from high school at my house for my birthday party. "
Dr.Edwin: " mhmmm."
Jackson: " My friends decide to take me to willy wonka's factory as a super neato birthday presant. But when we get there is when it turns ugly."
Dr.Edwin: " i see...now, what happens that makes it turn "ugly"?"
Jackson: " see?...when we first got there we were all pumped because, helooo, we were at willy wonka's factory!" [rolls eyes] "anyway, when the oompa loopas come out i get really excited thinking they are gunna sing me a birthday song or do a little jig. boy was i wrong on that. they sang a song, but it sure wasnt a birthday song...let me demonstrate..."
[Jackson sets up on the couch and grabs the dark brown teddy bear with one eye and light blue ribbon tied around it's neck, that was sitting just below where his head was.]
Jackson: "now...pretend this is an oompa loompa."
Dr.Edwin: *nod* "go on..."
Jackson holds the bear by the waist and sets one foot on his knee, changing the bears position with every second while singing "oompa. loompa. doop a dee DIE!!, you cant run away. but if you want. you can TRY!!"
Dr.Edwin: "i can see how that could be disturbing...i guess?"
Jackson: "yea. i know. but thats not all. the little monsters had lasso's made of nerds rope. they would get the rope circled around our ankles while we were trying to runa away, causing us to trip and fall over our own feet."
Jackson: " then when they got us down they would run over to us with thier glocks with everlasting gobbstopppers as bullets and shot my friends dead...while they were reloading, i had enough time to untie myself and get away, somewhat. it was only seconds later that they were hot on my A$$.
right when they threw the rope to capture me again...I WOKE UP!!!.
and ever sense, i havent been able to go near any kind of willy wonka product."
Dr.Edwin: "you say this was all a dream?"
Jackson: " yes sir."
Dr.Edwin: " and how often do you recall have this weird A$$ dream?"
Jackson: "about 4 times in the last week."
Dr.Edwin: "mhmm...i see..."
*doodles on his paper with one hand, running his other through his thin silver hair.*
Jackson: "so whats the damage doc?"
Dr.Edwin: "well Jacson, i have come to the conclusion that you are complaetely insane. and i think might possibly be THE biggest stoner this world has ever seen...i think you may have had a couple too many joints in your day. i have never in my many years as a shrink dealt with anyone so messed up. you are beyond any kind of help that i am able to offer.i am a shrink, im pretty sure the place your looking for is a rehab center...you should really check into that. your coming here has been a total waste of your money and my time and i am looking forward to never seeing you, or hearing your pointless rants again!...good day to you sir."
[jackson burst into tears and runs out of the room crying like a little girl, only to slip on some nerds candies that a little girl had spilled earlier. when he realizes what he had slipped on, he pees his pants and faints.]