Suicide Bomber

Suicide Bomber

(5m)   by ballekumar

Comedy Skits   (16469 Views 0 Comments)

Somewhere abroad ..

Trainer: You just go and press this red button and we will give you these new shoes.

Student: What will happen then?

Trainer: They all die and we will have a blast here when you come back.

Student: How will they die if we have a blast here? 

Trainer: I mean they die and you live and you have these shoes and then we party hard. You just run from that place after pressing the button and you get the shoes. Ok!!

Student: But if you give me the shoes before it would be easier for me to run

Trainer: Then there will be no motivation to do the work.

Student: But what will happen if I press this button.

Trainer: They all will die. Our enemies will die.

Student: Ok! Is there any other way of me getting these shoes then me without killing a few dozen people?

Trainer: No. You do want to impress your girlfriend?

Student: Yes.

Trainer: Then wear this belt and press the red button and you get these shoes.

Student:  Why don't you use guns or say grenades?

Trainer:   Our allies supplied us with sub standard material. That day it was my brother's birthday and to celebrate 

we threw grenades and they didn't burst. On top of that throwing those grenades revealed our location.

Only half of the guests were left alive to see my brother cut the cake.

Student: That is bad.

Trainer:  Imagine the humanity of our enemy, didn't even allow my brother to feel happy on

his birthday.

Student: Are you sure I will be alive after I do this?

Trainer: Yes of course , do you doubt us?

Student: Well , you all are wearing a mask and some of you seem to miss some limbs. I do doubt you people.

Trainer: Well! Let me introduce myself. I am Baba Ghanoush and this is my Hummus Factory. I use to make Hummus and sell it across the globe , they patented it. The name on the patent is John Doe. I asked them who is John Doe, they said everyone is John Doe. Then I decided all should die. My hummus is not mine, tomorrow they will patent my religion, my country and my wife too. Let me tell you a secret. Its a new invention and in this the suicide bomber escapes and all other die.

Student: Ok. I want to see a demonstration.

Trainer: Silly kid !! You will rot in hell! No demonstration!! I will shoot you now if you don't wear this and go.

Student: Relax I trust you. Tell me what else I need to know.

Trainer: If this doesn't work and if you get captured. You tell them you are from United Nations.

Student: Will they believe me?

Trainer: If they do then United States will be in war of United Nations. If they don't then as it is they will think you are a lunatic and they will just leave you.

Student: Wow the worst is that they leave me.

Trainer: Yes , its easy. The best they get killed and you get the shoes or worst they are alive and you get the shoes.

Student: That sounds good. But I don't want to kill them. They seem nice people to me.

Trainer: Just because they are building hospitals, roads and giving us education doesn't mean they are nice people. They want to rule over us , this is all their plan.

Student: If they are doing us so much good then worst case let them rule , who cares?

Trainer: We care. We want to be free. 

Student: But we are free. No one is holding me or you in chains.

Trainer: You won't understand you are a kid.

Student: You are so scared that you are giving this job to a kid instead of doing it yourself.

Trainer: I will shoot you now.

Student: No. Please don't , all I want is the shoes and I don't want to kill anyone.

Trainer: How about shoes with skates?

Student: Where will I skate in this desert? I am going. I don't want to do anything with you people.

Trainer: Ok. I will shoot you, wear this belt.

Student: Okk!!( Wears the belt)

Trainer: Good boy!!

(They drive up to the place where the bomb has to explode)

Student: I am going to press button now.

Trainer: What?

Student: You will die!!

Trainer: This is backstabbing!

Student: Keep the guns down and surrender, or I press this button.

Trainer: Even you will die.

Student: Liar , you said its a new invention. So its not.

Trainer: Press it.

Student: Okk , here you go.

Trainer: Wait!!

Student: Give me my shoes!!

Trainer: Here!!

Student: Surrender to them . Go 

(All the people surrender to the armed forces and the boy gets his shoes ..)

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5m Comedy Skits - Suicide Bomber