(2m)   by bkuniverse

Comedy Skits   (34000 Views 0 Comments)

Onion: I make them cry, when they cut me, I make them pay for it!

Tomato: Yes, how can I become like you. I am like easily crushed and sliced.

Onion: You are too soft man! You are too soft! Look at me, I am so strong that I just don't hang on the tree like you. I am so strong that the tree just drops me to the roots. You just hang in there to be plucked.

Tomato: Yes, they just pick me up and toss me in the basket!

Onion: For me, they must make their hands dirty! I make them sweat hard!

Tomato: What is the secret to your strength?

Onion: It’s in the genes dude! There is something in the seed that makes us what we are!

Tomato: But I want to be like you!

Onion: First, you need to change the way you look! Red color makes you look a flower! Look at me!

Tomato: But I have little control over how I look! It’s for a good reason that we are called vegetables. We can't do anything!

Onion: Now that’s what everyone is telling you! Don't let that discourage you! You must be positive, remember the law of attraction. Focus on the positive and that will amplify!

Tomato: OK! If I start saying I am an onion then slowly I will become one!

Onion: Yes, of course!

Tomato: Then why would I am so low in life. I would like to be a human being! The greatest creation of God!

Onion: The greatest creation of God is onion! Men fight over onions! Have you seen onions fighting over men! What use is a man to an onion?

Tomato: But men have freedom to move and act!

Onion: And they pay a lot of money to meditate! I am always meditating! See how calm every onion is!

Tomato: Yes, even I am always meditating!

Onion: You are meditating in the light, but I meditate in darkness. There is no light where I am! I do the best meditation! When you meditate in the dark you focus on the spark which is inside you!

Tomato: But a man can just pluck you from ground. A human being is infinitely stronger than an onion!

Onion: Yes, I mean but then I have no respect for that strength. Look here I am not doing anything to anybody, just minding my own damn business and I get pulled out of the soil. Its cruel! You want to be that cruel person!

Tomato: I want to be an onion!


Onion: OK! So, start saying to yourself that 'I am an onion' and slowly you will transform into one!

Tomato: When will that happen!

Onion: May be in a few billion years!

Tomato: That long!

Onion: Life is about the journey and not the destination!

Tomato: What if I get plucked!

Onion: Spread this message. Let every tomato say that he/she is an onion. Soon a time will come when there are no tomatoes. It will be all onions! Tell this to the potatoes, brinjals, green beans, spinach also! Let there be no other vegetable other than onions! For onions are the best!

Tomato: I will do so! What if people don't accept my view and refuse to say, 'I am onion'

Onion: You spread the message! There is truth in what I say that onions are the best! Sooner or later in a few billion years even animals and humans will get the message!

Tomato: Wow! You sound like a prophet!

Onion: A day will come when there would be just onions everywhere! Then onions will come out of the soil and dominate this planet and who knows, we might even dominate the solar system! The first onion to land on Moon! The first one to reach Mars!

Tomato: Yes! But do you think that an onion can reach the Moon!

Onion: Yes! Remember there was no life on earth once. Something came from the outer space. Similarly, it is quite possible than in a billion years, a small onion lands on moon! And when everyone is an onion then there would peace in the universe because an onion is so peaceful and meditative!

Tomato: So, your goal is universal peace!

Onion: Universal peace and brotherhood! And it is much easier to maintain peace if all differences just disappear! If we all are onions then there is no difference of opinion and peace follows!

Comedy Type: Humor Type: Comedy Scene:
2 Person
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2 Person 2m Comedy Skits - Onion