If Happiness is a Horse

If Happiness is a Horse

(3m)   by Julie Brewer
 

Comedy Skits   (4100 Views 1 Comments)

 

If Happiness was a Horse

  • Written by: Julie Brewer

Teacher:

The creative writing assignment regarding World War One is due tomorrow that is all class.

* sits down *

 

Student:

Teacher, can you please take a look at my assignment and give feedback?

Teacher:

Wow?! You did your work early, that’s a first. Let’s hear it.

Student:

It’s a poem--

[clears throat]

We had a great relationship--

Teacher:

Wait, what’s the title?

Student:

There is none.

[Teacher gives a confused look]

Teacher:

Uhh.. okay keep going.

Student:

we had a great relationship, a real rip snorter

then you made a arse of my heart, ripped out my aorta

you said we're not compatible, but its a fact

the science books say that opposites attract

a fun night out is what you said you would appreciate

shouldn't have brought you badger baiting on a first date

tried to do things romantic, but with you i came a cropper

you said handcuffs on a second date, wasn't right and proper

so i san---

Teacher:

Excuse me for stopping you for a second, but I’m having trouble following this poem…

Student:

It’s good right?

Teacher:

It’s confusing…

Student:

Maybe by the ending you’ll get it…

Teacher:

Alright…

Student:

So i sang to you neath your balcony, you seemed a touch afraid

should have left the amps at home, for that moonlight serenade

if happiness was a horse, you would be my saddle

if i was stuck in a creek of shit, you would be my paddle

if i was a hermit all alone, living in a quarry where the sun never shone

you would be my favorite stone, shined and polished but never ever thrown, away

if happiness was a horse, you would be my saddle

if i was stuck in a creek of shit, you would be my paddle

if i were a lion and you a deer, I'd turn vegetarian, do you hear

tell all the other cats their carnivore career, is now herbivore or they'll disappear, away

 

  • I’m done, how was it?

Teacher:

Was this… a poem about a horse?

Student:

Yeah! It was great right?!

Teacher:

The assignment, was to creatively write about World War I… what does “If I was stuck in a creek of shit, you would be my paddle” have to do with World War I? There’s NOTHING about World War I in here, you didn’t mention the propaganda, Battle of the frontiers, the three battles of Gaza, hell! if you wanted to talk about horses.. Why not mention war horses..  And this poem doesn’t even have a title!

Student:

So what you’re saying is… if this poem had a title… I would get the A?

Teacher:

[puts his hand on his head and begins laughing slowly… escalating into a hysterical laughter]

Comedy Type: Humor Type: Comedy Scene:
2 Person
Script Length: Post date:

Copyright Statement

Funny👍



Comments

   

Submitted by gritt brewer on Sat, 03/10/2018 - 07:59
not sure if we are related julie would never have thought of making that song into a sketch

2 Person 3m Comedy Skits - If Happiness is a Horse