Drunk

Drunk

(2m)   by bkuniverse
 

Comedy Skits   (27787 Views 3 Comments)

Robert and Steve are heavily drunk.
Robert: Do you know that Duck sauce has nothing to do with a duck?
Steve: What the f**k?
Robert: Yes, it is a duck's luck that Duck Sauce doesn't require a duck
Steve: Then why is it called Duck Sauce
Robert: The Chinese used to serve this sauce with the Peking Duck and that's why the name stuck
Steve: So does the Peking duck have anything to do with a duck?
Robert: Yes, apparently so
Steve: So in any case the poor duck is dead!
Robert: Yes. Why can't they use chicken instead of duck to cook Peking duck?
Steve: Then it would become Peking Chicken and that won't be good for a chicken!
Robert: Yes but it would be good for a duck
Steve: What difference does it make whether it is a Chicken or a Duck?
Robert: It makes a lot of difference to the chicken or a duck. You are selfish. You only think about yourself!
Steve: Why can't they make Peking Tofu? Then it would save the life of both the Chicken and the Duck.
Robert: I don't like Tofu, you see! I mean I would not pay any money for Tofu
Steve: What if Tofu is free?
Robert: Even then I wouldn't eat Tofu!!
Steve: Why? Don't you like Tofu!!
Robert: I don't like the name!
Steve: What has name to do with taste?
Robert: As Shakespeare said "Call a Tofu by any name and it is still a Tofu"
Steve: Shakespeare never said.
Robert: Chinese Shakespeare did!!
Steve: I didn't know there was a Shakespeare in China too.
Robert: China can replicate anything, so that is possible too
Steve: So China can replicate duck too!
Robert: Yes.
Steve: So why can't we eat a duck? If they can clone a duck then one can be spared for us.
Robert: Yes we can but if we do the poor duck is dead.
Steve: Yes. I got your point. But if they can clone a duck then technically it is not dead.
Robert: Yes, but duck has feelings too.
Steve: Even I have feelings to eat a duck. What about them?
Robert: But you can eat duck sauce it does not have feelings!!
Steve: Why doesn't it have feelings!!
Robert: Because it doesn't have a duck!
Steve: Seriously! Are you sure..
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Robert: Do you know that Duck sauce has nothing to do with a duck?
Steve: What the f**k?

The loop continues.

Comedy Type: Script Length: Post date: Script Market:
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Comments

   

Submitted by Ryan Pome (not verified) on Fri, 01/18/2013 - 18:36
Hi, can I please use this skit in my youtube video? I will give script credits to your name.
Submitted by bkuniverse on Sat, 01/19/2013 - 01:14
@Ryan Pome, yes please, you can use any of my scripts
Submitted by kumar (not verified) on Tue, 01/22/2013 - 02:30
Hi Balle, Wonderful .. perfect ... its like a scene between Seth Rogen and Jonah Hill ... like Ryan mentioned if I use this for a skit i will keep you posted too. Thx.

2m Comedy Skits - Drunk