The D. Trump Zombie Brigade

The D. Trump Zombie Brigade

(2m)   by Paxton55

Comedy Monologues   (15659 Views 0 Comments)

Exciting news for all those D. Trump supporters. Effective immediately you are considered to be part of a very exclusive group of blind followers called the "D. Trump Zombie Brigade." As a member of D. Trump's Zombie Brigade you have become part of an elite group of zombie bloodsuckers. Much like its fearful leader, members will take on lackluster characteristics including: Walk in a blind and somewhat contorted stupor

Possess a blank stare from lifeless eyes

Thinks "Make America Great" is speaking of South America

Follow blindly anything that moves

Believe D Trump would make a good leader (thoughts of Half-brain zombies)

Brainless zombies just don't think

Will believe lies are truths

Will wear false hairpieces

Will not believe in anyone who does agree with them

Will talk before they actually think

Unlike their zombie leader, won't have a penny to their name

As an added bonus, new members will have full annual pass membership to the D. Trump Theme part called "Donald's World." This egocentric theme park will feature the following:

The Rambling Rhetoric Roller Coaster

The Fictional Facts Ferris Wheel

The Wishy Washy Water Ride

The Phony Flume Ride

The Cacophony Carrousel

The Boastful Bumper Cars

While at the park, enjoy the D. Trump non-substances specialty sandwich, "The Trumpwich" (all bologna on a seedless bun). Every D. Trump Zombie Brigade member will also receive entry to the park and will have a chance to win an all-expenses (less $12,000 admittance fee) to Trump University where you can earn your Honorary B.S.D.A degree (Bullshit Dumb Ass Degree). Sorry this offer not available to Muslims or other factions who may disagree with the D. Trump ideology.

As an extra added feature, all D. Trump Zombie Brigade members will also receive the following:

The Joseph McCarthy Handbook on finger pointing innocent Americans

The Adolph Hitler "Guide to Blind Leadership"

The Charles Manson board game "Follow the Leader" (less game pieces)

And as an added bonus the "Drink Mixers Guide" personally signed by cultist Jim Jones.

Still as another added bonus is the Hannibal Lecter's "Guide to Open Pit Bar B Qing"

So don't delay, in November cast a mindless vote for D. Trump and follow him to the ends of the earth (although with his mindset that may very well be)

The aforementioned satire is meant to offend, ridicule and embarrass D. Trump supporters (hmmm... isn't that what he does to anyone who doesn't agree with him?)

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2m Comedy Monologues - The D. Trump Zombie Brigade