An African's Perspective

An African's Perspective

(2.5m)   by mowilliams

Comedy Monologues   (15125 Views 0 Comments)

Well I’ve been told I blend quite well into a crowd so in case you were wondering, I am said African

Decided to study law in Scotland because Dundee was the best law school i got into….. Plus you know how the saying goes “keep your friends close and your enemies closer except they are family"

Not my first time in the UK. I did a year of primary school here when i was 9 but hated it and left because my cousin bullied me. I heard he is a gambling addict now. Was quite happy to hear about that.

That said I’m really African. I’m basically "sell aftershave in a club toilet African" in how i think so i was a little apprehensive about going to Scotland to because i feared racism and more importantly the sight of grown men in skirts.

Neither the less my racial consciousness was tested immediately i got into town. I got into a bus and everyone was white. I wondered what procedure took place when a minority entered a bus. Should i sit up front? C’mon now i thought, don’t get cocky. Should i go to the back of the bus? F that Roser Park fought for that sh*t.

I sat down strategically in the middle of the because I'm politically correct you see. “Just blend in” i thought. I little girl sat beside her mom looked at me, then looked at her mom, then looked at me then looked at her mom. She pointed straight at me and said “LOOK MUM, A BLACK MAN”.

I looked around and said “WHERE???”

I saw everyone was looking at me and was like “dammit they noticed”.

Fast forward a couple years and I was an apprehension free final year student writing a dissertation titled “Is Poverty a breach of human rights?” Naturally i took notice when my home country Nigeria introduced a law that outlawed homosexuality and made it punishable by 14 years imprisonment. I told you I was real African. Stay with me now.

Excessive action i thought. I am sure everyone has their views but can we put legality and morality aside for a moment and consider something. I am not an expert on law enforcement but if a prison is supposed to be a correctional facility for sinners of society, i don’t think that's the best place to “correct” a bunch of gay guys !

Second thing i thought was how would they enforce this. PDA is not a big thing because of the culture so you would not notice gay people publicly. That was when i found out that a task force may be created to go out there and stop gay stuff from happening. Interestingly enough the name they wanted to call this task force was the “FEDERAL ASSOCIATION AGAINST GAYS”.

A moment for that to sink in.

The F.A.A.G because of course adding one A makes it all better. These guy would have basically been the FAAG forces.

That said, could you imagine a gay tourist visiting Nigeria on holiday with no knowledge of this? He firstly would not notice any gay people and if he tried to look the agents of FAAG would come and get him and take him to a facility with other gay people and a bunch of horny men.

Now i don’t know what that sounds like to you but if i was a gay man, that would sound like a lads holiday !

Comedy Type: Humor Type: Comedy Scene:
1 Person
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Author's Message

My first post. I know its personal but I thought it was a decent read and i think there's enough funny in there to personalise and still have it work minus all those personal references unique to me. Will post more generic material but please let me know how you feel about the script.

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1 Person 2.5m Comedy Monologues - An African's Perspective