(Song) The Evening Class Schedule

(Song) The Evening Class Schedule

(2m)   by k.r.johnson
 

Comedy Monologues   (1269 Views 0 Comments)

To the tune of The Flowers That Bloom in the Spring by Gilbert and Sullivan. Please note that if you want to perform this song you will either have to get permission to use Gilbert and Sullivan's tune, or write an original tune. A Midi version of the tune is here: http://onlinesequencer.net/3027603

 

The evening class lists have arrived, Tra la,
They promise me something to do.
For which of them should I apply, Tra la,
To learn something totally new, Tra la,
I’ll stand in the applicants’ queue,
They’ll know that I haven’t a clue.

I’ll tell you the subjects and make them all rhyme,
Accounting, mathematics and talking in sign,
There’s woodwork and baking,
And candlestick making,
Or country dance, tap-dance or line.

There’s sledging and skating,
Impressionist painting,
Sketching, or Graphic Design.

 

There’s German and Russian and Dutch, Tra la,
There’s Spanish, Italian and French.
I don’t go abroad very much, Tra la,
I’ll make my acquaintances blush, Tra la,
The lot of them think I’m too dense,
For idiom, gender and tense.
Though Gaelic’s too guttural, Chinese too hard,
They make you learn scribbles from pieces of card,
I’ll learn to make cider
Or pilot a glider,
Or offer the healing touch.

But if I am honest, there is, as I fear,
Nothing of interest here.

 

It’s too cold to ramble or stare at the sky,
I don’t want to conquer my fear,
I don’t want to care for my bike, so I
Won’t book a class this year!

Comedy Type: Humor Type: Comedy Scene:
1 Person
Script Length: Post date: Script Market:
Public
Permission for use:
Permission not required

Author's Message

I am grateful to Martha Wells of the Edinburgh group Rogue Writers. She wrote a poem which inspired this song. You may use this script in any way you want, but if you make money out of it, I want a share. This song goes to the tune of ‘The Flowers That Bloom in the Spring’ by Gilbert and Sullivan. If you want to perform this song in public you will either have to get permission to use Gilbert and Sullivan's tune, or write an original tune. A Midi version of the Gilbert and Sullivan tune is here: http://onlinesequencer.net/3027603

Copyright Statement



Comments

No comments yet, be the first to write one!

   

1 Person 2m Comedy Monologues - (Song) The Evening Class Schedule