The Fox

The Fox

()   by k.r.johnson

Funny Memes   (753 Views 0 Comments)

Late at night in old Redhall a fox came by my door,
She broke in through the cat flap and found shoes upon the floor, 
She thought, ‘I’ll take them home with me, they’re too good to leave here,
My cubs will love to play with them, I’ll bring them all some cheer.’
The Foxy stole my footwear, she ripped my life apart, 
And it takes more than an asp’rin to heal a broken heart. 

So I took mescaline, amphetamine, esomeprazole,
Fentanyl, the birth control pill, paracetamol,
GHB, LSD, Ecstasy as well,
The Sheriff saw me shootin’ up an’ threw me in a cell. 

The Sheriff said, ‘You reprobates deserve your time in here,
I do not think they’ll let you go for many a long year, 
I’ve found a little friend for you. I know how pleased you’ll be,
She stole some shoes in ones and twos. She done grand larceny.’
The fox that stole my trainers and chewed my cowboy boots,
We’re goin’ to hang together like we were in cahoots. 

The Foxy said, ‘Forgive me.’ I said 'Sure, I don’t feel bitter. 
You done me wrong, but we’ll get along. Don’t fret so, little critter.
I’m headed for an unmarked grave with no headstone at all,
While you will be a trophy mounted on the jail-house wall.’

I'll leave the calaboose same day they throw me down a hole,
My spirit may die with me, but Foxy got my sole. 

Comedy Type: Humor Type: Comedy Scene:
1 Person
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Author's Message

This is my attempt to write Country And Western. It's based on actual events on Thursday night 25 May 2023, or at least the first four lines are. The bit about jail I made up. You'll have to write a tune for it or get permission to use somebody else's. Any generic, sententious Country and Western tune will do, in the style of the great Johnny Darrell. You may use this script freely but please let me know if you do. If you make any money out of this script, I want a share.

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1 Person Funny Memes - The Fox