Cinema-9

Cinema-9

(10-30m)   by samuel zehr
 

Sitcoms/Stage Plays   (520 Views 0 Comments)

cold open

fade in:

int. Sc villa apartment - day

DREW DAVIDSON (21) - Dead-beat, 5 o'clock shadow. - slouches uncomfortably on his couch; holding cell phone to ear.

answering machine(v.o)

You have 4 new messages. First new message. 7:45 AM.

Drew opens a twist-off beer and sips it.

Loud beep on cell phone.

Ben Landry (v.o)

Hi Drew (Feminine voice) this is Ben Landry, Dan Rikman's assistant. I hope your having a great day! But I regret to inform you that Rikman Management does not accept unsolicited query letters. On behalf of Rickman Management I would like to thank you for thinking of us; unfortunately we are...

Drew glances down at screenplay on his coffee table.

Ben Landry (V.O)

...Unable to take-on your pilot episode for "Mama-Bang-Bang". Best of luck to you, and your script. (long pause) Okay-okay I did read the script and it's just wonderful! I'm not supposed to do this but I'm going to leave a copy on Rick's desk-just in case. Have a beautiful day! Bu-bye.

Drew picks at a bowl of cold top ramen balanced in his lap. Yummy.

Phone beeps loudly.

answering MACHINE(V.O)

Next Message. 8:30 AM.

Dan Rikman (V.O)

What the fuck am I looking at! Why did my faggot assistant put this faggot script on my faggot fucking desk! (Ben Landry apologizing in background). Fuck you Ben! Fired! (Sound of breaking glass - Ben Landry screams) - God Fucking dammit! Get out!!! Ah! Let me ask you something Drew - do you have a time machine? Because there's 5 minutes of my fucking life gone! Wasted! Reading your shit! Fucking dog-shit! fucking faggot shit! One more email from you and I swear I'm going to show up at your no-doubt, shit-hole studio apartment and jack off in your GODDAMN top-ramen!!!

Phone beeps loudly.

drew

Jesus Christ.

Continues eating top ramen.

answering MACHINE(V.O)

Next message 8:45 AM.

Susan DAVIDSON (V.O)

Drew this is your mother. I'm gonna say something you don't want to hear.

drew

(Frustrated)Ugh..

Susan DAVIDSON (V.O)

Writing is just a cream dream Drew! There's no money in it! If you were able to show me one paycheck maybe, just maybe I'd support your decisions! You know that by the time I was 22 I already had your brother, a job, a house... You need a real job son. I talked it over with your Dad and we are done sending you money. Love you.

Phone beeps loudly.

Drew sets down his phone and takes his beer into the shower with him.

answering MACHINE(V.O)

Next message. 8:55 AM.

Phone beeps loudly.

Brett (V.O)

Hey buddy! Your favorite cousin here. Any luck with the Lit. Agents?...Anyways just checking in on you. Hope your alright!...Oh yeah I got you that interview with Ms. Snyder - It's at 3PM! Please don't show up late... or drunk! Alright see you soon. Love you buddy.

Phone beeps loudly.

answering MACHINE(V.O)

End of messages.

ext. sc apartment parking lot - day

Drew turns the key in the ignition of his car. Nothing happens. Turns key again. Nothing.

drew

Fuck.

ext. downtown - day

Drew weaves between traffic on his skateboard coming to a stop outside of a large movie theater. He looks up at the marquee and see's the larger and life words: "Twilight".

cut to black:

Title: "Cinema-9"

act one

fade in:

Int. Office - Day

Drew sitting in adjustable stool-chair - drenched in sweat - nervously rubbing his fingers on the sandy grip-tape of a skateboard.

Woman (o.s)

As I was saying, lucky for you Jimmy is no longer working for us so we do have an opening.

Drew stops fidgeting and looks across the desk in front of him REVEALING: Ms. Snyder (33)butch, horn-rimmed glasses, pantsuit.

Ms. Snyder

There's only so many times I can walk in on a man rubbing-one-out to my wife.

Ms. Snyder notices Drew eyeballing the framed picture of her attractive wife. Snyder turns the picture face down on the desk.

ms. SNYDER

Don't you fucking think about it...

drew

(nervously) I...I...

ms. SNYDER

You wouldn't believe how many times I had to Windex that thing. Thank god it's in glass now.

Anyways Andrew...Should I call you Andrew?

Drew

Drew's fi --

Ms. Snyder

Alright Drew. Well as I was saying, in lieu of Jimmy's compulsive masturbation stunt; I now have one full-time position open, and its yours if you want it. We start at $8/ an hour, and it's not all glorious. But you know, it's a job; and we have a wonderful staff.

Drew

(hesitantly)Yeah, that'd be cool I guess.

ms. SNYDER

Alright. Lets take one more quick look over your resume...So your Brett's cousin, okay. Under previous employment you wrote down "writer".

Drew

Yeah, I love to write--

MS. SNYDER

Don't give a fuck... Alright. Alright. Okay so you have been a cashier before, that's actually good...So tell me why do you want to work here?

Drew

Well my writing career isn't really going anywhere and I owe my landlord money so I--

MS. SNYDER

Would it be possible for you to start today?

drew

Umm I guess so.

mS. SNYDER

Good. Good. Big day today and we're short staffed. Let me just see if we can find Jimmy's old work shirt.

Ms. Snyder fumbles through her desk drawers.

mS. SNYDER

Here we go.

She pulls out a long-sleeve collared shirt covered in unforgiving light stains. She grabs a bottle of Windex and sprays the shirt a few times.

ms. SNYDER

There we go. right as rain.

Throws shirt to Drew - landing on his finger. Drew examines the shirt - small star insignia on lapel. Below insignia faded letters read: "Cinema 9. Jimmy".

ms. SNYDER

Go on out to the bathroom and get changed. I'll send someone over to meet you. Just leave the skateboard in the office.

Drew exits the office.

Ms. Snyder puts the picture of her wife back up; facing her. She sprays Windex onto her hands and slaps them together. She puts her hands down her pants.

ms. SNYDER

Just me and you...

int. movie theater bathroom - day

Inside bathroom stall: Drew begrudgingly puts on his new jizz-stained work shirt, tucking it in. A near poisonous septic smell is growing from the adjacent stall. Horrible bowel movement noises.

Drew

(Plugging-nose) My fucking god.

Guy taking dump

Sorry about that amigo! Pop-corn butter gets me every-time. Looks like brown gold.

More horrible noises.

DREW

(genuinely concerned)You okay in there?

Drew takes flask out of his pocket. Quick shot.

GUY TAKING DUMP

Just gotta pinch the rest out an I'll be err...all good.

Sounds like a shit waterfall.

guy TAKING DUMP

Say you seen "Twilight" yet? I'm here with my daughter to see it. Sexy...

Giant liquid release

guY TAKING DUMP

...Vampire movie. Damn I'm probably missing the good parts!

You hear a chant of "Team Jacob" from outside of the bathroom.

guY TAKING DUMP

Team Jacob!

drew

(weirded out)okay good luck.

Drew exits bathroom.

int. movie theater snack bar - day

Claire (25) - torn jeans, cute butt, - Ferociously pumping liquid butter into a popcorn bag. She turns around and hands the dripping popcorn bag over the counter to goth-girl. Butter drips out of the bag onto the customers "Jacob-Twilight" shirt.

goth girl

You suck.

`claire

Jacob sucks!

Goth girl stomps away.

INT. MOVIE THEATER LOBBY

Lobby is flooded with goth girls and parents. Just outside the men's bathroom Emilio (25) short trained hair, professional demeanor - stands holding a clipboard.

Emilio

Aw you must be the new guy!

drew

I'm Drew.

eMILIO

Emilio (handshake)Nice to meet you. Picked a hell of a day to start.

They peer over the sea of goth kids running around.

Drew

Yeah, I guess, vampire movie?

`

emilio

Yeah it's a super shitty one too. I mean I like "Blade", "Queen of the Damned" was okay. But this...ugh (spits on ground) What a waste. What we need is more Wesley Snipes in this world. That guy is a bad-ass.

Drew

I guess.

eMILIO

He is. Have you seen "Blade"? Never-mind. Anyways let me show you around the place.

int/ext. - theater front door - dAY

A group of three young teens (15) are having their backpacks searched by the theater Door-Man(38)-lanky.

Teenager

What the hell man. You can't do this!

Door-man

Actually since the recent Cine-Plex shootings management is having me check any and everyone with a bag. It's a safety thing really. Nobody goes into this building with an un-searched bag.

Beautiful woman walks past Door-Man carrying a bag.

Door-MAN

(Smiling)Enjoy your movie ma'am.

TeenAGER

(Bummed)What the hell man.

DooR-MAN

Aha. Well what do we have here.

Door-Man pulls a 12 pack of the backpack.

tEENAGER

It's my brothers I swear! He borrowed my backpack the other

Day --

Beer confiscated.

Door-MAN

Alright boys, head on up.

The bummed out fifteen year old's grab their backpacks and run over to the indoor escalator.

Door-Man cracks open a beer-can, sips it.

15 year old see's Door-Man drinking his beer and flips him off. Door-man gives the kid a thumbs up.

doOR-MAN

Oh to be young and sober.

Emilio and Drew come walking by. Noticing their presence Door-Man quickly hides the beer.

Door-MAN

Emilio!

Emilio

Door-Man!

INT./EXt. BOX OFFICE - DAY

Peering out the box office window Josh Holiman (23) tired, dark rings under his eyes - views the onslaught of "Twilight" fans gathered on the sidewalk. He looks down at his computer screen: "TWILIGHT" SOLD OUT.

JOSH

Wow. Sad.

A Police officer (43) cliche mustache - walks up to the voice-hole in the glass.

Josh

(W/out looking up) "Twilight's" sold out. Fuck off.

Police officer (V.O.)

Excuse me?

Emilio and Drew enter box office.

Josh

(Eyes on screen) I'm not going to say it again kid. Go jerk-off to "True-Blood" in the comfort of your home like everyone else who missed the Fandango pre-sale!

emilio

Josh!

josh

Shit! Sorry officer what's up?

Officer slaps a mugshot poster of an overweight man with a mullet against the glass.

POLICE OFFICER

Have any of you seen this man.

emILIO

(To Drew) No.

drew

Nope.

JoSH

Na sorry.

polICE OFFICER

(concerned)I'm going to need to speak with a manager.

Emilio puts walkie-talkie to his mouth.

eMILIO

Snyder do you copy?

No response.

EmILIO

Snyder do you copy?

Still no response.

EMILIO

She's not answering her walkie. Just go ahead inside and take the escalator up to the lobby. Her office is the last door on the right.

Police Officer slides a copy of the mugshot through the window slip. nods and exits.

EMILIO

Josh this is Drew, Jimmy's replacement. Drew, Josh.

Josh hardly acknowledges that drew is there. Staring out window.

josh

Feast your eyes on this shit-show. Look.

Drew

Umm what I am I looking at?

Emilio

Is that --

Josh

Yes that's a 40 year old man sharpening his K9's with a nail file. Christ.

int. movie theater - auditorium 1 - day

A theater employee walks the dark isle of a near empty auditorium with glow-stick. A horrible Nicolas cage movie is playing on screen.

Int. office - day

Police officer enters office unannounced.

poLICE OFFICER

Oh, shit!

Ms. Snyder quickly pulls her hands out of her pants.

Police Officer, turned away, slaps himself in the face. Regains professional stance.

PolICE OFFICER

Excuse me umm, ma'am.

Ms. SNYDER

(Blushed) How can I help you officer?

PoLICE OFFICER

Ma'am we have reports of this man (holding up poster) touching himself up and down the coast. He was in Regal earlier today watching "Kung-Fu Panda" but managed to get away.

mS. SNYDER

"Kung-Fu Panda"? Really?

poLICE OFFICER

Sick offender's like this love that Pixar shit ma'am...Honestly I don't understand it myself. Couldn't get hard if I tried- watching that crap haha.

mS. SNYDER

Okay officer --

polICE OFFICER

Joe Smith, ma'am.

Officer and Snyder shake hands. He looks at his hand after - sticky, wet.

OFFICER joe

Ew.

ms. SNYDER

Thanks for the warning Joe. We'll keep our eyes peeled for that guy.

OFFICER joe

(Focused on his hand)

You do that.

Officer Joe exits office.

Ms. Snyder looks down at the Sex Offenders mugshot left on her desk.

Ms. Snyder

Sick bastard.

She sprays Windex on her hands. Re-positions photo of her wife and goes back to touching herself.

int. movie theater lobby - day

Drew and Josh walking towards the snack bar. Drew is texting on phone.

[[Note: text messages in italics.]]

brett (text)

You get the job?

drew (text)

Here now. Big Twilight day :(

emilio (O.S.)

Dude I'm telling you. Do a rewrite with Snipes as the protagonist!

bRETT (TEXT)

HAHAHAHAH. LOL !!! HAVE FUN!

emILIO (O.S.)

Nobody can resist that beautiful black face. Drew?

drew (TEXT)

(sad face emoji) G2G TTYL. Thanks for job hook-up.

emilio

Drew!

drew

What's up?

emilio

Snipes man! Snipes!

Drew

(Hates it) I don't know.

Emilio's walkie-talkie going off: BEEP.

ms. SNYDER (v.o)

Emilio do you copy?

EMILIO

(Into walkie-talkie)Roger.

mS. SNYDER (V.O)

I'm gonna have you check auditoriums 3 through 7. Have Claire train the new guy at the snack bar.

eMILIO

(Into walkie-talkie) Affirmative.

drew

Claire?

Emilio

(Pointing her out) Blonde over there by the pop-corn machine. I gotta go do some theater checks.

Emilio walks off.

ext. street corner in front of theater - day

It's a beautiful southern California day. Black hair and mascara are a common site in the ever-growing crowd of "Twilight" fans hanging out in front of the movie theater. A man with short bleach blonde hair, combat boots and trench coat walks hastily-by the crowd of goths.

Goth kid

Hey fuck you Spike!

Trench coat guy

Buffy will always be better!!!

Goth kid's parent

He's actually right Bobby.

int. movie theater snack bar - day

Drew walks up behind Claire by the popcorn machine.

Drew

Hey there, I'm Drew.

Surprised Claire drops hot-dog bun she's holding.

Drew

Shit, sorry. Claire right?

Claire

Yep.

Drew

Didn't mean to startle you there.

Picking up hot-dog bun.

Claire

It's okay. This is actually perfect.

Claire eagerly begins to ad nacho cheese and popcorn to the bun.

Claire

You see were not allowed to sell shit that drops on the floor...so...

Continuing prepping bun.

ClaIRE

Just add a little goodness to the bun and wala!

She holds her disgusting snack with pride.

Drew

It's like a ghetto grilled cheese.

Claire

(Smiling) Technically it's a "shame sandwich".

She takes big bite.

Claire

(Food in mouth) Here try some!?

Drew

I dunno...

Claire

C'mon new guy...Sorry what's your name again.

Drew

Drew.

claire

You gotta try it! Mm-mm... Shamey. Shamey. Shamey.

Drew

(Smiling)Alright fuck it.

Drew takes a nibble of the "shame sandwich".

Drew

Actually not half bad haha.

Claire

What'd I tell ya. "Shame-Sandwich". Kinda my culinary coup-de-grace.

Goth Girl walking past snack bar, see's them sharing the "shame sandwich" and shoots disgusting look.

Claire

Good luck washing out the butter stain!

Goth Girl stomps off towards the bathroom.

Claire

(Quietly) Bitch.

int./Ext. - box office - day

Angry "Twilight" fans crowd the glass booth window.

crowd

(Chanting) Twilight! Twilight!

jOSH

I told you all! (Mockingly) Sold-out! Sold-out!

A balding middle aged man makes his way through the chanting crowd to Box Office window.

Bald guy

One ticket for "Bangkok Dangerous".

JOSH

Thank fucking god.

int./ext. theater front door - day

Eager "Twilight" fans - pushing and shoving one another at Door-Man's ticket ripping podium.

DooR-MAN

Come on everyone! Form a line! Form a line!

Door-Man quickly ripping ticket after ticket - dropping stubs in podium slot.

dooR-MAN

Theater 1 will be up the stairs and to your left. Theater one will be up the stairs and to your left.

Door-Man see's small child in his peripheral.

Door-man

Nice costume little guy!

Kid, holding un-ripped ticket, smiles showing fake vampire teeth.

DooR-MAN

Wow cool teeth buddy!

Kid waves around un-ripped ticket teasingly and runs past the podium onto the crowded escalator.

Door-MAN

Hey kid! You little shit! Get back here!

Door-Man abandons his post running after the kid - pushing and shoving his way up the crowded escalator.

Customers waiting to get tickets ripped look around at each other, shrug, and walk past the unmanned podium.

end of act one

act two

int. theater snack bar. - day

A small line of customers are being served snacks by various employee's. Drew and Claire stand by popcorn machine filling bags.

clAIRE

Wow, so Juniper finds out about her mom's true identity at the end. Isn't that kind of predictable?

Drew

Well..

CLAIRE

Sorry I'm not trying to hate on your script. I know writing's hard.

drew

Do you write?

CLAIRE

Fuck no. I've been doing some auditions for commercials but so far nothing good. My agent keeps promising me a meeting with Spielberg - but I'm pretty sure he's just saying that...

`

drew

Why? I could see you on TV.

ClAIRE

You don't even know me. I appreciate it though. But yeah he just wants to tap this ass.

Claire jiggles her butt, spilling pop-corn on the ground.

Claire

Oh my god have you seen this yet?

Pointing at mugshot of pervert taped behind the counter.

DREW

Haha yeah I saw it.

Claire

So creepy. Get this I heard he came here last week and got butt ass naked during "WALL-E". I mean what the fuck.

drew

(David Attenborough impression) Here we have a pervert in his natural environment! The pervert stands rigorously tugging his genitals to children's animated Fantasy/Science Fiction film "WALL-E". The pervert performs this act completely nude; with little disregard to those he offends.

Claire

Hahaha.

drew

Whoa! Claire check this out. (Pointing).

Drew and Claire see the Door-Man struggling with his shoe lace caught in the escalator. A kid in a vampire costume runs past him into the crowded lobby.

int. movie theater lobby - day

dooR-MAN

Someone get that kid! Get that little shit!

Displeased parents jump over Door-Man at the top of escalator, not stopping to help.

Drew and Claire rush over to the escalator and cut the shoe lace free with the edge of a popcorn scooper.

dREW

You okay man?

dooR-MAN

You guys see where that kid went? Little shit ran right past me at the podium.

CLAIRE

I dunno.

dooR-MAN

(Looking for kid)Your out here somewhere. Where are you vampire waldo? Where are you?

Door-Man scans the crowded lobby for the kid. Door-Man and kid lock-eyes. Kid smiles and taunts Door-Man with un-ripped ticket.

door-MAN

I got you now you little bastard.

The kid runs over to a loose A/C vent-cover on wall. Kid pushes vent cover to the side and crawls in.

DooR-MAN

Goddamn-it.

cLAIRE

It's just a kid man. Who cares if he sneaks in. What's the big deal?

Door-MAN

Big deal is there's a kid crawling around in a vent. If he gets hurt or anything. I could get sued or fired for this shit. Fuck!

Claire

Crawl on in there.

dooR-MAN

I can't fit in that shit.

Door-Man and Clair look to Drew.

Drew

No way man!

CLAIRE

You don't have to worry about getting your shirt any dirtier.

Drew looks at his shirt and grins.

Door-MAN

Come on new guy. Jimmy would-a done it. Do it for Jimmy!

cLAIRE

(mockingly)Yeah do it for Jimmy!

drew

Alright, alright! I'll do it. Not for Jimmy. (grinning). Fuck here goes nothing.

Drew pushes A/C vent-cover to the side, and crawls in.

int. theater a/c vent - day

drew

Hey kid! come on outta there. I got some candy! (Quietly) What's wrong with me.

Kid peeks back from around a far away corner of the vent tube grinning; then crawls out of sight.

DREW

Shit

Drew chases the kid further and further down the ventilation tube. They pass by open vent-screens where you can see and hear movies playing in the various auditoriums.

drew

Come on kid. It's not safe in here.

Echoing noises of the kid crawling further away down the vent tube.

Drew

Aw fuck it.

Drew's phone beeps. He stops. Checks his messages.

brett (TEXT)

How's that first day goin dude?

drew (TEXT)

Lost in vent.

bRETT (TEXT)

WTF???

int. movie theater lobby - day

Ms. Snyder approaches Claire and Door-Man.

MS. SNYDER

Hey Door-Man what are you doing? back to your station!

door-MAN

Yes ma'am.

Door-Man walks off.

Claire stands back against the wall; blocking the open vent cover.

mS. SNYDER

Claire. What are you doing?

Claire

Nothing.

mS. SNYDER

Yeah that's what I thought. Back to work! You're not getting paid to do nothing.

Snyder walks off.

cLAIRE

(Face to vent) Drew are you okay in there?

drew (v.O.)

I'm lost! Help me get out of here!

cLAIRE

(Face to vent) You find the kid!

drew (v.O.)

No!

Customers passing by give Claire concerned looks as they see her on her knees talking into the vent.

CLAIRE

(Face to vent) I gotta go back to the snack bar. I'll check back on you in a bit. Good luck!

Drew (V.O.)

(echoing out vent) What?!?!

Claire walks off.

int. theater a/c vent - day

Drew sits uncomfortably in A/C vent drinking whiskey out of his flask. You hear echo of kids voice giggling from far down the vent.

int. theater auditorium 4 - day

Emilio is leaning against the back wall; tears in his eyes. "The Boy With The Striped Pajamas" plays on big screen. Old woman approaches him.

old woman

(Whispering) Excuse me, young man?

emiLIO

(Whispering) Hey.

old woman

(Whispering) Is there any way we can get the heat turned up in here? It's freezing.

emILIO

(Whispering) Yea, sure no problem.

old woman

(Fiddling with hearing aid) What?!

Drew

No problem!!!

Other people watching the movie look over at Emilio pissed.

old woman

(Whispering) Aw thank you sweetie.

int. auditorium 4 - quiet room - day

Emilio on walkie-talkie.

emILIO

Snyder, do you copy?

ms. SNYDER (V.O)

What's up?

eMILIO

We got a old lady complaining about the temperature in auditorium 4. Is it alright if I crank the heat up in there?

ms. SNYDER (V.O)

Is there alot of people watching?

eMILIO

Na, just her and a couple of others.

MS. SNYDER (V.O)

Ah go ahead its fine.

emILIO

Copy that.

int. a/c vent - day

Drew is starting to feel drunk. Crawling further down the vent he pauses taking swigs of whiskey from his flask.

int. theater AUDITORIUM 4 - day

Back-wall of the auditorium. Emilio presses buttons on the digital thermostat until we see it read "94-F".

int. movie theater snack bar - day

Claire hands a customer small pop-corn and soda.

Claire

Are you sure you don't want to sign up for a cine-plex rewards card?

Customer

(Quick and angry) No!

Josh comes behind the snack bar and fills a cup of soda.

Josh

Hey.

CLAIRE

Hey Josh. Break time?

JoSH

Yeah, finally. It's a shit-show downstairs. If one more quote unquote vampire asks me if he has permission to enter, I'm literally going to kill myself.

ClAIRE

I hear you.

Josh

Yeah. So how's the new guy working out?

Claire

You know I think he's actually enjoying the work.

Josh

(Speculatively)Right...

int. theater a/c vent - day

Drew, drenched in sweat, crawls quickly through the vent tunnel.

drew

Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!

Overheating.

Drew bursts through a close-by vent cover into auditorium 5.

int. theater auditorium 5 - day

"WALL-E" is playing on the big screen. One customer sits in theater seat by the vent.

Grasping for air Drew takes a swig from his flask.

Customer

Hair of the dog?

drEW

Huh?

customer

Oh I've been there. Used to drink every day. Hated my life. Changed all that shit though. Put the bottle down.

drew

You in AA?

cusTOMER

No. I just made an active choice to stop. It was easy after my wife left me. Kids still don't talk to me.

drew

Sorry man.

cusTOMER

It's okay. Just had to replace my habit with another habit.

Drew takes another swig from his flask.

customer

Take a load off. You've been working hard all day.

Customer pats his hand on the seat next to him.

Drew looks around the auditorium. It's just him and the customer.

drew

Ah what the hell.

Drew takes the empty seat next to the customer.

Customer

Oh man watch this. (Pointing at screen). I love this part.

Drew watches part of a stupid scene of the kids movie.

Customer

Popcorn?

drew

Ah, why not thanks man.

cuSTOMER

My pleasure.

Drew reaches his hand into the popcorn bucket on the customers lap. Inside the bucket he feels a man's penis.

The light on the big screen reveals the customer's face:sex offender.

Drew

Ah!!!!

customer

Snake got the worm!

int. movie theater lobby - day

Drew is sitting on a bench in the lobby dumping hand sanitizer on his tainted dick-hand.

claire

That's fucked up.

Josh

Haha holy shit man you actually fell for the popcorn trick?

drew

Dude...(disappointed).

Josh

Haha holy fuck man that's classic.

The police officer has the pervert-customer in handcuffs - escorting him out.

OfficER JOE

Really? "WALL-E" again?

customer

Oh you know me.

officer JOE

5 theaters in one day. I hate to say it but I'm actually impressed.

customer

Say officer, do they have TV in jail?

Officer joe

Fuck yeah we do.

int. entrance to auditorium 1 - day

Emilio stands - holding a trash can - outside the auditorium that "Twilight" is being screened in. The movie has ended and teary-eyed fans pass-bye to exit.

emilio

(To customers) Please pick up your trash. Please throw away your trash...

A crying "Twilight" fan passes by Emilio.

Fan

It was so (sobbing) good.

The fan carelessly throws her half full soda cup in Emilio's direction, spilling all over him.

EMILIO

Fucking "Twilight".

end of act two

tag

ext. corner outside movie theater - night

Fans exit out the doors of the movie theater. The neon marquee shines bright in the night sky. Men are offering women their coats. Children are eating their popcorn to-go. All is well in the universe.

ext. movie theater roof - night

After hours: the staff of the movie theater hanging-out on the roof - drinking-beers and smoking-cigarettes.

josh

Well I think you would've made Jimmy proud. Day one, and you've already touched a cock! To Drew!

Emilio and Claire

To Drew!

All the employee's raise their beer cans and drink.

Drew's cell phone buzz's.

BRETT (TEXT)

Dude that's fucking crazy!? Remind me to never shake your hand again LOL.

drew (TEXT)

LOL.

bRETT (TEXT)

At-least you've got some new material to write about. HAHA.

doOR-MAN

Hey Drew, you ever find that kid?

Int. theater auditorium 6 - night

The wide eyed kid stuffs his face with popcorn, intently staring at violent "Punisher: War-Zone" scene playing on the big screen.

fade to black:

End of episode.

Comedy Type: Humor Type: Comedy Scene:
1 Person
Script Length: Post date: Script Market:
Public
Permission for use:
Permission required

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1 Person 10-30m Sitcoms/Stage Plays - Cinema-9