turnip of death song

turnip of death song

(2.5m)   by gritt brewer

Comedy Skits   (3319 Views 0 Comments)

Leslie Merry minding his own business just walking down the street

doing it the conventional way, using his god given feet

all of a sudden its zoning in, gonna make him take his last breath

veg shaped like genitalia is funny, but not a turnip of death

cos you've danced your last dance, when you take a chance with the turnip of death


Leslie Merry was unlucky, but the irony is rich indeed

he would have jumped for joy, if told he was meeting a stunning swede

nearly all at the funeral done their best to look upset

when they planted that poor man, who was turnipped to death

for you wont be hanging around, if you boogie on down with the turnip of death


maybe it was thrown from a passing car, or flung from a nearby roof

or came from the depths of Hades, they never found no proof

for Beelzebub when it comes to grub, its a safe bet

would say no to the fancy stuff, and choose a turnip of death

for finales loom real big, when you deign to jig with the turnip of death


you can dress a turnip in a wacky wig, can draw it a smiley face

still you'll cower from its awesome power, you know its a head case

yes you can cuddle broccoli, cabbage is a ideal pet

and cauliflower is docile, but not the turnip of death

soon be all over, if you go and bossa nova with the turnip of death


its a lethal weapon you can grow, though cumbersome and crude

cant have a playful turnip fight, unless they're thoroughly stewed

cos they can cause many deaths, for its easy to forget

in any packet of cute little seeds, might be a turnip of death

for you'll be a also ran if you can can with the turnip of death


if you give Hamas turnips, they'll bring Israel to its knees

Isaac Newton be another corpse', if sat beneath a turnip tree

potatoes, they will only bruise, you can pummel with a courgette

but you're talking vegetable or worse with a turnip of death

you'll be gone like the Dodo,if you go and tango with the turnip of death


the man is shunned who sells the gun, we snub the man who deals

deplore their lack of morality, cruel hearts that wont heal

now behold the sinister greengrocer, who can cause ructions

supply a despot with turnips of mass destruction

there is no deliverance, if you river dance with the turnip of death

Comedy Type: Humor Type: Script Length: Post date: Script Market:

Author's Message

am not a fan of turnips

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2.5m Comedy Skits - turnip of death song