Eddie Izzard Glorious (01:01:38)   retweet
| More
retweet  

EDDIE IZZARD Stand Up Clip - Glorious (part 1) (09:55)


Glorious is the title of British comedian Eddie Izzard's 1997 performance at the Hammersmith Apollo in London. The performance was released on video/DVD and on CD. The CD version is a recording of a different night. Both performances cover topics such as the siege of Troy, Noah's Ark, the Royal Family to the birth of baby Jesus. In many ways, the flow of topics follow from the Bible, starting with the beginning of time according to the Old Testament and ending with Armageddon according to the Book of Revelation, though they are covered in Izzard's usual non-serious style. Izzard followed Glorious with Dress to Kill in 1999.   Glorious Quotes Beekeepers, yes… They've gotta want to be – "I want to be a beekeeper! I wanna keep bees! Don't wanna let them get away; I wanna keep them! They have too much freedom … I want bees on elastic, so when they get pollen, they come back here! My father was a beekeeper before me, his father was a beekeeper before him; I wanna walk in their footsteps … and their footsteps were like this: [running wildly from imaginary bees] I'M COVERED IN BEES!! [God, who was James Mason, to Noah] "Noah, stop what you're doing and build me an ark!" [Noah, who was Sean Connery] "I'm working on a speed boat at the moment. Much more exciting. It'll really kick ass, give great photographs for the people in Bible." "I've wiped the file? .... I've wiped all the files? .... I've wiped the INTERNET? I don't even have a modem!" "Give us cash! I steal from the rich and give to the poor! I’m trying to be a myth; give us cash!” “No, I’m not gonna give you cash.” “Go on, I steal from the rich. Are you rich?” “No, I’m… comfortable.” “That’s no good, I can't steal from the fairly well off and give to the moderately impoverished! That’s not gonna swing, is it?” On Robin Hood I don't have techno-fear, I have techno-JOY! I love technology! I love to get a new machine. Every time I get a new machine, I think, 'This is the one! I won't have to work again; I've got THIS thing!' And if you have techno-joy, you get the instructions, you unwrap it, and you throw the instructions out the window! [mimes doing so] Forget them! Fuck 'em! [mimes turning on a computer] On. [mimes typing] I must know how this works, I've used machines before! Source: http://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Eddie_Izzard

in Stand Up Comedy, Religions, English: British Comedy, Science/ Technology, Featured Clips, Random Observations, Eddie Izzard


Article Rating    Total votes: 24             Views (16780)    Comments (0)

Comments

No comments so far. Why not kick things off?


Leave a comment
(Comments by registered users will have a link to their comedy zone profile. Example.)

Name (required)

Email (required)

Website

CAPTCHA image
Enter the code shown above:


comedy